The Miracle of the Testicles October 20th

Image from Facebook

St Artemios is the patron saint of male genital disorders, more specifically, hernias and ruptures. His Saint’s Day is October 20th St. Artemios was Governor of Egypt during the reign of Julian the Apostate (331 – 26 June 363). Julian was a philosopher. nephew to Constantine the Great, who tried to turn the tide and return to traditional Roman religious practices. Artemios was called to a military meeting with Julian where he witnessed and objected to abuse of Christians. He was tortured with red hot irons, and miraculously cured. Then he was taken to the Amphitheatre where there was a big stone broken in half, and was put on half stone and the other half was raised above him and released crushing Artemios. He was presumed dead, and left for a day. But he was still alive, broken boned, disembowelled, eyeless and remained unwilling to renounce his religion and Julian ordered his beheading.

A noble woman took his body to Constantinople where his shrine soon started attracting miracles. In the 7th Century an anonymous author compiled a record of the miracles. St Artemios had become known for healing hernias and genital disorders ‘mostly in men.’ I’m not sure entirely why. Perhaps because of the red-hot pokers? The disembowelling? Maybe the stone that crushed was round?

I first came across the Saint when my mother-in-law bought me a wonderful book called ‘A Medieval Miscellany selected by Judith Herrin and with an introduction by the great Emmanuel Le Roy Ladurie (see Jan 27th Post to read about Montaillou and Ladurie). It had a colourful spread called ‘The Miracle of the Testicles’ which was the story told by Stephen, a 7th Century deacon of St. Sophia in Constantinople who ‘suffered a rupture, whether from shouting acclamations or from a heavy weight, I cannot say.’

To cut a long story short, Stephen was very embarrassed by his condition and eventually tried many cures and finally undertook surgery, which was successful but very soon the condition reoccurred which left him to despair.

Scrotal Hernia Operation, italy
Scrotal Hernia Operation, italy

So he planned to visit the shrine of the great healer of testicles, but was too embarrassed to stand in the Church ashamed to be seen by friends. But passing by one day he nipped into the Tomb, descended to where the relics were and ‘cast’ some of the Saint’s holy oil on his testicles. He then found, much to his surprise, that the doors to the Coffin itself were open. Seeing this as a divine intervention he jumped onto the coffin, straddled it face down, so that the corner of the tomb was rubbing his testicles and prayed:

And with tears, I spoke again to the martyr: “St.Artemios, by God, Who has given you the gift of cures, no doctor on Earth will ever touch me again. So if you please, cure me. But if not, to your everlasting shame I will live thus without cure.

He was not cured immediately. Later he went to the Hot Baths and bathed, and on leaving the baths, thanks be to St Artemios, he was completely cured.

I have transcribed the translation of Stephen’s writings and place it here below as it has many fascinating aspects and remember it is a 7th Century account. But what an extraordinary tale: that it seems reasonable to steal into a tomb, take the holy oil, rub your genitals all over the shrine, and then tell the Saint that it will be to his everlasting shame if he does not make the cure!

For more on the Hospital of Sampson click here. Livanon is one of the Roman Baths in Constantinople and it is interesting that the cure follows bathing in them. The Oxeia is a neighbourhood in Constantinople connected with St Antemios. A cautery is a method to remove or close off a part of the body. It can be hot, cold or chemical.

At long last I disclosed the misfortune to my parents, and after many treatments, (how many!) had been performed on me. Finally, after taking counsel with them, I entrusted myself for surgery to the surgeons in the hospital Sampson, and I reclined in the hospital room near to the entrance to the area devoted to eyes.

After I had been treated all over for three days at night with cold cauteries, surgery was performed on the fourth day. I will omit to what horrible things I experienced while on my back.

To sum up everything, I state that I actually despaired of life itself at the hands of the physicians. After God, entreated by the tears of my parents, restored my life to me, and after the scar from the incision and the cautery had healed, and just as I was believing that I was healthy, a short time later, the same condition recurred and so I reverted to my former state…

I had a plan to approach the holy martyr, as I had heard of his many great miracles. Still, I was unwilling to wait in the venerable church feeling ashamed before friends and acquaintances to be seen by them in such condition. But I frequently used to pass by (for at that time, I was staying in the Oxeia). And so I descended to the holy tomb of his precious relics, and I cast some of his holy blessing, I. e. oil on my testicles, hoping to procure a cure in this manner. And frequently, I entreated him to deliver me from the troublesome condition…

After descending to the holy tomb, I found the doors in front open and I was astounded that they were opened at such an hour. This was the doing of the martyr, in his desire to pity me, Stretching out facedown on the holy coffin, I straddled it, and thus contrived to rub the corner of the same Holy tomb on the spot where I was ailing. And with tears, I spoke again to the martyr: “St.Artemios, by God, Who has given you the gift of cures, no doctor on earth will ever touch me again. So if you please, cure me. But if not, to your everlasting shame I will live thus without cure.’ And after some days I went to the bath in the court of Anthemios, the one called Livanon to bathe by myself at dawn in order not to be seen by anyone . And entering the hot chamber, I noticed that I still had the injury. But upon exiting, I had no injury, and recognising the act of kindness on the part of God and the martyr which is befallen me… in thanksgiving… I do now glorify them proclaiming their deeds of greatness throughout my whole life.

From Medieval Miscellany selected by Judith Herrin Pg 54 the Miracle of the Testicles

Originally, published on February 13th 2023 Revised, and republished October 20th 2024

On the 23rd of February 2023 I opened this post with the following:

I hope you will forgive me for raising this subject early because of personal circumstances.

Yesterday, I did a Chaucer’s London Virtual Tour – one I first prepared during the dark days of Covid. As I was revising the presentation, I was surprised to discover that I had illustrated a piece on medieval health care (St Thomas Hospital, Chaucer’s Physician) with images of medieval hernia operations. Surprised, because I am currently recovering from an inguinal hernia operation and suffering a little so that the image (above) which, coincidently, popped up in facebook made me laugh. Obviously, I was meant to write about testicles today.

Battle of Hastings October 14th 1066

Map of 1066

Today is the anniversary of the most fateful battle in British History.  The victory by William the Bastard led to over 300 years or so of control of England by a French aristocratic elite. 

William the Conqueror sitting on his throne with his pudding basin haircut and shaven face

French replaced English as the language of the ruling elite which, over the long term changed the English language to a powerful, nuanced hybrid language.

Arguably, it also  established a class system in which the ruling class was separated from the ruled by language, education, culture and wealth.  And which has reverberations down to the present time.

It pivoted England from a North Sea power to a European state.  And it may have contributed to England becoming a less community based society. 

To put it briefly, if England had remained focussed on the North Sea region would we now have a society more like the Scandinavian Countries – more willing to spend money on the public realm, a more equal and a happier society? less willing to educate their children in elite Fee paying schools separate from the people of the country?

Personally, I’m quite angry with King Harold II.  He should have won the Battle of Hastings, or at the very least made sure that defeat at that battle did not mean conquest by the Normans.

The battle should have been won by Harold and the English.  Had Harold not have rushed to confront William, following the astounding victory of Harold’s army over Harold Hadarada at Stamford Bridge, in Yorkshire.  This would have allowed his troops to recover and give time for fresh tropps to join him.

The 1066 claimants to the Throne of England

While waiting, Harold could have arranged the harrying of William’s army, attacking their supply lines, increasing their anxiety, and sapping their resolution.  When Harold had reached maximum strength, then would be the time to take on the weakened Norman Army.

But also, he should have had a succession plan. What would happen if he lost the battle?  Who was to succeed him?  As it was, he took his two brothers with him to the Battle where all three of them died, leaving no clear adult heir to the throne.  The English soon surrendered to William after the Battle of Hastings, precisely because there was no clear successor unless that person was William himself. 

Given the catastrophe for the English ruling class that William inaugurated, it’s difficult to understand why the English magnates decided to accept William as King.  But let’s have a shot at looking at it from their point of view, they remembered that the reign of King Cnut, a Dane, created a successful fusion of English and Danish culture that was more stable than that of the weak English King Edward the Confessor.  So, recent history taught: better a strong foreign King than a weak English King.

They were not to know that William would ensure that virtually all English nobles, church leaders, language and culture, would be swept aside and replaced by Norman and French alternatives. England would never be the same.

As to the Battle itself, there is no definitive account of what happened.  We don’t know the composition of the armies nor their number.  Estimates vary from 7,000 to over 20,000. But it was a ferocious battle which lasted all day and was often in the balance. 

Harold fought the battle early, probably for 2 main reasons.  Firstly, he had won the Battle of Stamford Bridge with the same tactics of fighting immediately after a long march, surprising the enemy and winning an overwhelming victory.  Secondly, William had landed on Harold’s own land and Harold would not have easily borne a foreign power devastating his own people. 

Normans burning English houses.
Reading Museum copy of the Bayeaux Tapestry Photo Kevin Flude

So, he matched as quickly as he could from London to Senlac near Hastings, where Battle Abbey would be later sited.  He chose the top of a ridge, with a stream or ditch in front of it.  William accepted battle and fighting began early in the day.  Troops were still arriving to reinforce Harold.  All he needed to do was hold his ground till dark and reinforcements would probably have made William’s position untenable.

Harold would have established his shield wall, although there are suggestions this was done while the Normans attached. 

Mounted Normans confront the Saxon Shield Wall. 
Reading Museum copy of the Bayeaux Tapestry Photo Kevin Flude

Harold seems to have held the ground until late afternoon.  There are suggestions that his army was weakened by their rash pursuit of the retreating Normans down the hill.  The Normans thought William was killed but he showed his face to reassure his troops, rallied his troops and turned on the English who without the protection of their shield wall and the high ground were badly mauled.  The Normans renewed their attack.

At some point Harold’s brothers were killed, followed by Harold himself, possibly after being injured in the face by an arrow, but that is not proven. 

As darkness fell the English retreated, pursued by the Normans.  The English fled back to London.  The Normans attached London Bridge, but Londoners stoutly defended the Bridge led by the  Portreeve Ansgar.  The Portreeve was the Kings official in London similar to a Shire Reeve.  He also had the Danish title of ‘Staller’.  He is thought to have been wounded at the battle of Hastings.  The next day the Witangemote met in London and elected Edgar the Atheling as King.

The Normans retreated and proceeded to harry the South, trying to find a crossing point over the Thames.

To be continued.

Charlie Watts owned a 19th Century reproduction of the Bayeaux Tapestry and this has just been sold. It was photographed by a V&A photographer. (strictly the photography of the museum which is now known as the V&A.) To see more follow the link below.

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2024/jan/29/bayeux-museum-lands-19th-century-reproduction-of-tapestry-for-16000?utm_term=65b730e6db0a371ac9c15f2aed7f9cf8&utm_campaign=GuardianTodayUK&utm_source=esp&utm_medium=Email&CMP=GTUK_email

Michaelmas Old Style – October 11th

St. Michael weighing souls during the Last Judgement, Antiphonale Cisterciense (15th century), Abbey Bibliotheca, Rein Abbey, Austria (Wikimedia by Dnalor_01 license (CC-BY-SA 3.0))

It is the day that the Devil fell out of heaven and landed in a Blackberry Bush, and you are, therefore, not supposed to eat them after October 11th. St Michael’s Day is celebrated on September 29th but before September 1752, it was celebrated on what is now October 11th, Old Style. This means before the introduction in the UK of the Gregorian Calendar.

Saint Michael is the chief of the archangels. Saint Gabriel was celebrated on the eve of the Annunciation on 24 March. St Raphael on the 24th October, But more recently the Churches celebrate all the Archangels at Michaelmas, which is often now called the celebration of St Michael and All Angels.

Apart from its religious significance, St Michael’s Mass was an important date on the civic calendar. Terms began, rent fell due, and work contracts ran out. It was the end of the ploughman’s year, and the day when Hiring Festivals or Mop Festivals took place. Look at my post on the Stratford Mop festival

So in Oxford, the autumn term is called Michaelmas. The Spring Term Hilary on St Hilary’s Festival of January 14th, and the third term is called Trinity, which takes place on Trinity Sunday the first Sunday after Pentecost. The law courts also have a Michaelmas term.

It is one of the Quarter Day’s of the year, close to the Solstices and the Equinox into which the medieval and early modern world was divided:

(Copied from Wikipedia).

It is probably too late to tell you this year, but it is said that “if you eat goose on Michaelmas Day you will never lack money all year”

St Michael is one of seven (or four, depending on traditions) angels. He was protector of the Israel. He has four main roles in heaven. He is the leader of the heavenly host in its defeat of Satan. He is the Angel of Death, the Weigher of Souls, and the Guardian of the Church.

Going to the Mop in Stratford-upon-Avon & Henley-in-Arden 11th & 12th October

Stratford-upon-Avon Mop Festival

This year the Stratford mop festival was on the 11th and 12th October. I was in Stratford for it, and the centre of the Town is crowded with a cacophany of shooting galleries, stalls selling toffee apples, candy floss, burgers and all things bad for you. And a fun fair. Quite raucous, but they leave Henley Street free of it which is probably a good idea. Nothing at all sophisticated, or literary or dramatic, or folkloric. Just a good old-fashioned fun fair in the middle of the town. Below I tell the story of my discovery of the Mop.

Last year, at this time, I was on my way to Stratford-upon-Avon Railway station, I saw the sign above sign, but had no idea what on earth a Mop was.

So I put it to the back of my mind as I took the train to Henley-in-Arden. My interest in the town began because Shakespeare was born in Henley St in Stratford, and his mother was called Mary of Arden. So, naturally, I wanted to find out about Henley-in-Arden. To turn curiosity to action, it took our Tour Coach Driver telling me he lived there and that it was a pretty but small town.

I had a free afternoon from my duties as Course Director on the ‘Best of England’ Road Scholar trip, so I got on the very slow train to Henley-in-Arden. One of the first stops was Wilmcote, where Mary Arden’s House is. I visited two years ago, when I was astonished to find it was a different building to the one I had visited in the 1990s.

In 2000, they discovered they had been showing the wrong building to visitors for years! Mary Arden’s House was, in fact, her neighbour Adam Palmer’s. And her house was Glebe Farm. On that visit, I walked from Stratford on Avon to Anne Hathaway’s Cottage then to Mary Arden’s House and back to Stratford along the Stratford Canal – a lovely walk if you are ever in the area.

The train route to Henley is through what remains of the ancient forest of Arden. The forest features in, or inspired, the woody Arcadian idylls which feature in several of Shakespeare’s plays, particularly the Comedies. ‘As You Like It’, for example, is explicitly set in the Forest of Arden, as this quotation from AYL I.i.107 makes clear:

Oliver: Where will the old Duke live?

CHARLES: They say he is already in the Forest of Arden, and a many merry men with him; and there they live like the old Robin Hood of England: they say many young gentlemen flock to him every day, and fleet the time carelessly as they did in the golden world.

Henley-in-Arden turns out to be a quintessentially English little town full of beautiful timber framed buildings and a perfect Guildhall.

Guildhall, Henley-in-Arden

Further down the road is a lovely Heritage Centre full of old-fashioned and DIY Information panels. And that is not a criticism, it provided a very enjoyable visit full of interesting stuff and which gave me a couple of snippets of information I have not seen anywhere else.

So, to get back to the signpost for the Mop, I was delighted to find a panel dedicated to the Henley Mop. A mop turns out to be a hiring fair. Think of Gabriel Oak in Hardy’s ‘Far from the Madding Crowd’. His attempt to become an independent farmer destroyed when his sheepdog runs amok and sends his sheep over a cliff to their doom. So he takes his shepherd’s crock to the hiring fair or Mop as they are known in the Midlands. There, potential employers can size up possible employees and strike mutually agreed terms and conditions. And Gabriel becomes the shepherd for the delightful and wilful Bathsheba Everdene.

So, a shepherd would take his staff, or a loop of wool; a cleaner her mop (hence the name of the fair), a waggoner a piece of whipcord, a shearer their shears etc. Similarly, in the Woodlanders (by Thomas Hardy) the cider-maker, Giles Winterborne, brings an apple tree in a tub to Sherborne, to advertise his wares.

The retainers thus employed would be given an advance and would be engaged, normally, for the year. So there was quite a widespread moving around of working people to new jobs and often new housing. Not quite how we imagine the past?

The perceptive among you will have noted the bottom of the sign in Stratford which advertised the ‘Runaway Mop’. This was held later in the year, so that employers could replace those who ran away from their contracts, and where those who ran away could find a better, kinder or more generous boss.

Henley Mop – panel from the heritage centre

Also of interest to me was the panel about Court Leets and Barons. These were the ancient courts which dealt with, respectively, crime and disorder, and property and neighbourhood disputes. Henley still has its ancient manorial systems in use, at least ceremonially. The Centre shows a video of a cigar-smoking Stetson-wearing large rich American arriving at the Guildhall to take over duties as lord of the manor after purchasing the title.

There was another panel of great interest to me as it told the history of Johnson’s Coach Company which was taking my group around England. And it was a delight to discover that it has a history that can be traced back to 1909 in Henley. I conveyed this information to our group on the following day as we toured the Cotswolds. Curtis, our driver, was able to update the panel and told us that the family were still involved with the firm, which is still operating from the area. He said the two brothers who run the company come in every working day and do everything they require of their drivers to do; i.e. they drive coaches, clean coaches, sweep the floors and generally treat their staff like part of a big family. I should have asked him whether he got his job at the Mop, while holding a steering wheel in his hands!

Johnson’s Coach Company -Panel from Henley Heritage Centre

First published in 2023 updated 2024

Hardy’s Henge Given Protected Status

Through the window of Hardy’s Max Gate house, you can see a Prehistoric Sarsen Stone, originally part of a neolithic stone circle or henge. (bottom right window pane, top left corner). Photo: Kevin Flude

Author of ‘Tess of the d’Urbervilles’ Thomas Hardy was an architect and designed his own house. During the work on Max Gate, the builders came across a large block of sandstone of the type called ‘Sarsen’ at Stonehenge. Hardy, who loved history, had it relocated into his garden and called it his ‘druid stone’. One of the most famous scenes in Tess is when she is sleeping on the Altar Stone at Stonehenge as the Police move in to arrest her for murder. Hardy loved history, and how glad he would have been to know his house was in the middle of an important Henge. The Altar Stone, by the way, has very recently been discovered to be from Scotland. A discovery that confirms that Stonehenge was an immensely important site in the Neolithic and Bronze Age.

Hardy’s Henge (aka Flagstones) turns out to be older than Stonehenge. In the 1982, a geophysical survey in advance of the Dorchester Bypass, found evidence of a circular enclosure outside Hardy’s house. But there was an excavation in 1987-8 which discovered a large circular bank, 100m in diameter, from the Neolithic period. The other half of Flagstones, is largely preserved beneath Max Gate, and has now been official listed and therefore protected. The excavations suggested a date of construction of 3,000 BC, about the time of Stonehenge’s first construction.

Max Gate, Hardy’s House on the outskirts of Dorchester, Dorset. Photo Kevin Flude

In 2022, targeted excavation designed to explore the other half of the circle revealed further dating evidence that proposes it was built 500 years before Stonehenge, earlier than 3,500BC, making it one of the earliest in the South West. It was giving listed protection on the August 19th, 2024.

The enclosure consists of a single ring of unevenly spaced pits, forming an interrupted ditch system roughly circular, but the dating evidence does not prove that this circuit was built before 3,500 BC, but shows there was a neolithic presence on the site at an early date. Burials were found in the bottom of the pits forming the enclosure and in four of the pits were found markings on the lower pit walls cut by flint forming pictograms of varying forms from curvilinear, to linear. There was little activity in the Late Neolithic and the site seems to have been reused for funerary and ‘other practices’ during the Bronze, Iron Ages and Roman period.

The site is built on a ridge parallel with the River Frome. Dorchester is another ‘ritual landscape’ like Stonehenge, where there are a cluster of important Neolithic and Bronze Age monuments. In the centre of the Town, a couple of miles from Max Gate, was found evidence of a massive wooden circle. The postholes are found marked on the floor of the town centre car-park as shown below. The Great Henge is 360m in diameter, covering much of the much later Town Centre and built in around 2100 BC.

Neolithic Circle in Dorcester (photo Kevin Flude)

Just outside of Dorchester is a Roman Amphitheatre which began life as another Neolithic circular enclosure with an external bank, and an inner Ditch in which were dug 44 tapering pits, up to 10m in depth. Antler picks, chalk objects, including chalk phalluses, were found.

Maumbury Rings – Neolithic Enclosure, Roman Amphitheatre, place of execution, Civil War defense, and fictional meeting place of the Mayor of Casterbridge and his estranged wife, Susan Newson (or Henchard!)

A few miles away, at the Iron Age Hill Fort of Maiden Castle, is a Neolithic Causewayed Enclosure.

Maiden Castle. Iron Age Hillfort. the East End was originally a Neolithic Causewayed Enclosure

Together, with evidence from Stonehenge, Avebury, Heathrow and elsewhere shows a clustering of ritual places in important landscapes, which suggests, possible evidence of regional organisation. Stonehenge, however, continues to lead the way for evidence of an importance that drew people, or objects from not only England, Scotland and Wales, but also from the continent.

For further details of the Flagstones listing and excavation, here is the official listing document:

https://historicengland.org.uk/listing/the-list/list-entry/1489792?section=official-list-entry

First & Last Coal-fired Power Stations September 30th 2024

Holborn Edison Electric Light Station

Today, Britain’s last coal-powered power station generated its final watt of electricity.  Ratcliffe-on-Stour’s closure means Britain is the first country to meet its target of phasing out coal.

The Nottingham power station opened in 1968, and once employed over 3000 people.

For more details follow this link https://www.theguardian.com/business/2024/sep/30/end-of-an-era-as-britains-last-coal-fired-power-plant-shuts-down

The first coal-fired power station in Britain was at Holborn Viaduct in London, opened as the Edison Electric Light Station on 12th January 1882.

The power was generated by a steam engine powered by coal.  The electricity powered incandescent electric carbon-filament lights which lit up 986 lights to illuminate the road from Holborn Viaduct to St Martin’s-le-Grande.  The light bulb was invented 3 years previously. 

The number of lights was soon increased to 3,000. But the Station made a loss and was closed down 2 years later. The lights converted to gas.  The building was destroyed in the Blitz.

A couple of miles to the East, in 1895, the Shoreditch Electric Light Station was established.   It used waste to produce electricity and steam for the local public baths.  The generating and combustion chambers, now houses a Circus School which my children attended.

It was officially opened by Lord Kelvin, the famous physicist in 1897. The Consulting Engineer was Edward Manville who came up with a scheme for a ‘dust destructor’; an electricity generating station; a public bath heated by the waste heat from the generator; a library and museum.  It cost 200,000 pounds.  In 1899, in nearby Nile Street, the Shoreditch Vestry Council set up the first municipal housing scheme powered by electricity.

This level of enterprise by a local council seems like a fantasy of a distant past but also, given the sustainability of the project unbelievably modern.

The motto on the side of the Power Station was ‘Light and Power from Dust’. The scheme was run by the local vestry council which adopted the motto ‘More Light, More Power’. This was also adopted by the new municipal Borough of Shoreditch when it was formed as part of the new London County Council.  The Power Station was renamed as the rather wonderful: Shoreditch Borough Refuse Destructor and Generating Station and adorned with the motto: PULVERE LUX ET VIS ‘Out of the dust, light and power’.

The story of the dust destructor and the generating station is told in some detail here and well worth a read.

I will add a few more pictures once off the train.

William the Bastard invades England September 28th 1066

Bayeux Tapestry, Harold with moustache swearing an oath, William with pudding basin haircut sitting down at left.

Harold II was scurrying south after almost annihilating the Viking army of Harold Hardrada, when he heard news that the Normans had landed at Pevensey. (see my post (battle-of-stamford-bridge-september-25th-1066)

William was an unlikely Duke because it is very rare for illegitimate children to take the title of their father. It was normally not even considered as an option. A legitimate cousin or uncle would be chosen instead.  But he not only got the title and survived many rebellions, but was known as the William the Bastard

He came to England in 1051 to see his distant cousin Edward the Confessor, who was the son of the English King Aethelred the Redeless (the Ill advised – more often called ‘the Unready) and Emma of Normandy.  Edward, whose marriage to Emma was not great, insofar as both made claims to be holy virgins, had no children and, according to William, offered the throne to him.

Did he, though? The Pope agreed he did.  William claimed that Harold of England agreed too. And not only that, but he agreed under Holy Oath.

The Bayeaux Tapestry, shows Harold making an oath with his hands on holy relics. But British Historians see it as inadmissible as it either never happened or, if it did, then it was not freely given as Harold had been detained on a visit in 1064 and was probably never going to get home until he took the oath.

They also say that Harold was the legitimate King because he was elected as was traditional by the Witanagemote, the King’s Council.

But was he really? He had no English Royal blood in him, only a very distant touch of Danish royalty on his mum’s side.  It is true the Witan elected Kings and often did not choose the first in line but preferred the best suited candidate be he brother, cousin or uncle. But Harold was only the brother of the King’s wife, no royal blood there.  However, Harold was so powerful that he would have prepared the ground for his election irrespective of whether this was the freely given choice of the Witan. His father, Earl Godwin, had been a disloyal and over mighty subject of King Edward, but had prepared the way for Harold to be virtual ruler of the country long before the King died.

So, there was plenty of scope for a contested succession. Harold was the English contestant who had already defeated the Norwegian claimant. Now, he was rushing to put to rest the Norman claim.

William had begun by getting Pope Alexander II’s blessing and with that, spent 10 months planning the invasion. He recruited adventurers from Normandy, France, Brittany, and Flanders. His allies collected boats for the invasion, while William had hundreds of new boats built, using thousands of carpenters, metalworkers, carters etc and cutting down a vast number of trees. 

The boats were ready by 12 August near Caen on the River Dives.  They set sail, but contrary winds blew them into Saint Valery-sur-Seine.  Winds in the summer are usually blowing south on that coast, and William had a long, frustrating wait for a north wind.

Meanwhile, Harold was waiting with his army and a 400 ship navy at his manor of Bosham on the South Coast.  Then he heard about the Norwegian invasion of the north and calculating that it was getting too late in the year for William to risk invasion, decided, on September 18th to go North with his army, which was the more immediate risk to his throne.

Map of the the progress of William;s fleet. Opinion suggests landing was on 28th September 1066

On September 27th, the north winds blew, the Normans embarked, and on the 28th of September William and his boat, given as a present to him by his wife, found themselves alone in the Channel off the English coast.

After an anxious wait, the rest of the fleet was spotted sailing towards William.  They landed at Pevensey.  Built a castle at Hastings and proceeded to ravage the land of Harold’s homeland. Harold had by now destroyed the Norwegian threat at Stamford Bridge on 25th September, and was marching South when he heard William had landed.

To be continued

‘Crack Me This Nut’ Play performed at the Rose in Southwark September 25th 1595

List of plays performed in February 1596 by the Admiral’s Men

‘Crack me this Nut’ was performed by the Admiral’s Men at the Rose Theatre in Southwark, London. One of the dates it was performed was on September 25th 1595, and as you can see, above, it was also performed on February 7th 1596.

The play was performed 16 times in all, then sold by Edward Alleyn. Sadly, no one knows what it was about. It might relate to the sense of our phrase ‘a tough nut to crack.’ You can find the other dates it was performed, and the income generated in this blog from Henslowe’s papers.

The list of February dates for the Admiral’s Men is from my dossier for my Shakespeare’s London walks. I’m not entirely sure of the book I photocopied it from, but it derives from the wonderful archive of Philip Henslowe and his leading actor Edward Alleyn. Henslowe’s records were stored in a locked trunk for 260 years.

Last year, marked the completion of the project to bring this archive to the public. The Henslowe-Alleyn Digitisation project. As well as digitising the Archive, elements that had been separated from the original archive have been brought back, so the greatest archive of information on the Shakespearean theatre is now unified and available. It is an immense bit of news for the Shakespeare industry.

I searched the archive for ‘Crack me this nut’ but their search engine searches for anything that mentions ANY of the words, and as the word ‘this’ is in virtually everything in the archive, the search is effectively useless. Putting ‘Crack me this nut’ in quotes does not help. I have emailed them!

A subscriber sent me another link which has various speculations, and the following entry.  For more read https://lostplays.folger.edu/Crack_Me_This_Nut

Master Ponsonby. Entred for his copie vnder the hands of the Wardens A booke
Intitled The Paragon of pleasaunt histories . . . vjd
Or this Nutt was neuer Cracked Contayninge a Discourse of a
nobl[e] kinge and his Three sonnes /


(S.R.1, 3.57 / Fol. 7)

This raises a possibility that it was not a comedy but a history or a tragedy.

I often use this list of plays performed in February 1596 in the walks and lectures I give on Shakespeare. It shows you how hard-working Shakespeare’s contemporaries were. The actor’s companies were essentially small repertory companies. This list shows that the Admiral’s Men performed 14 different plays, if I count correctly, in the short month of February. Moreover, the list is from a winter month. Now, the guides at the rebuilt Globe tell you the Shakespearian Playhouses were used in the Summer. No! This was deep winter and 23 performances in an outdoor theatre in February! Imagine what a modern actor would think of that work load.

A badly photocopied page of the archive.

First published on February 7th 2023, and revised and republished on September 25th 2024

Partial Eclipse September 18th 2024

Loughcrew Neolithic carvings.

September 17th/18th sees a partial lunar eclipse. In London, the peak of the eclipse will be visible around 3:45 a.m. BST on September 18, while it was on the 17th September in the USA.. And it’s also a supermoon when the moon is at its closest to the Earth.. Sorry, you are unlikely to get this on time!

Could ancient people’s predict eclipses? Well, lunar eclipses are relatively easy to predict, while solar eclipses are difficult. But it is likely that Babylonian and Assyrians astronomers could. Have a look at https://www.queensu.ca/gazette/stories/eclipses-were-once-associated-death-kings-attempting-predict-played-key-role-birth for more details,

There are plenty of people who believe that eclipses can be predicted by Stonehenge. And it certainly can be used that way, but this doesn’t mean it was. A series of stones, and posts in concentric circles with sight lines to innumerable features on the horizon offers many ways of making calculations which combined with observations over a long period COULD predict, predictable celestial phenomena. Doesn’t mean they were. So it is very difficult to say what they were capable of, and only the most obvious alignments can be certainly confirmed.

This Washington Post article below suggests the Loughcrew Cairns near Dublin were built about the time of a total eclipse, and that one of the stones with complicated carvings on may show a lunar eclipse. If you look at the sketch of the stone above, you will see the biggest circle, near the middle, may represent the moon, and it obscures the circle behind it which may represent the sun. Read this for the details: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2017/08/18/this-5000-year-old-stone-carving-may-be-the-worlds-first-drawing-of-an-eclipse/

What is striking is how can they say it was built around the time of a total eclipse and make that seem significant because there is no way archaeological dating is accurate enough to give any idea whether it was built for a particular day. Also, there are many more circles and objects on the large stone, and to pick two out to prove what you want it to prove, is not proof. We are left with the intriguing possibility, but it is no more than that.

John Goodricke and the Variable Star. September 17th 1764

What I really admire are people who, through their sheer brain power, can change our views of the world.  The first example that comes to mind is Newton’s insight that if the universe were infinite, the night sky would not be dark as everywhere there would be tiny pinpricks of starlight.  So, we don’t live in a infinite universe. Another one is Einstein’s thought experiment that proves that time is relative. But see below for a description of that. 

But now to Goodricke.

Yesterday in York, near the Minster, I saw the blue sign above, which I read and thought, what on earth are ‘variable stars’?  Behind me, I heard two women say something like. ‘Here it is,”variable stars”‘.  I turned around and asked them what was a variable star?

‘Donno’ they said, ‘we’ve ‘just doing this escape room walk around York.’  They showed me a booklet they had received on the internet, which was what I would call a treasure trail.  But no, they insisted, ‘this is an escape room adventure where we collect clues to decipher the code to escape’.

Such is the modern tourist!  Sadly, they showed no interest in finding out what a variable star is!

Aristotle and ancient philosophers held that the universe was unchanging and eternal. The first breach in that theory was the identification in 1638 of star Omicron Ceti by Johannes Holwarda who discovered that the start pulsed on an 11 month cycle.  This and the discovery, of supernovae (first observed in 1572), proved that the ‘The starry sky was not eternally invariable’.

John Goodricke was educated at Thomas Braidwood‘s Academy, school for deaf pupils in Edinburgh, and Warrington Academy. He returned to live with his parents who rented an apartment at the Treasurer’s Hall, near the Minister in York, and used a friend’s personal observatory to look for variable stars. He found two of the first 10, and was the first to propose a solution, which was that two stars orbited each other causing eclipses between them and the observer, and thus creating a variation in the light emitted. To be able to extrapolate from a simple observation and provide an explanation which necessitates a complete rethink about the nature of the universe seems, to me, to be awesome.

Back to Einstein, his thought experiment was something like this:

A train is travelling through a station. There is an observer on the train towards the front, another on the platform as the train goes through. There are two simultaneous lighting strikes at either end of the train. The observer on the platform sees the strikes as simultaneous as she is in the middle between the two lighting strkes and light travels at the same speed. The observer on the train who is near the front of the train will see the lighting strike at the front of the train before the light from the back of the train can reach him as it has further to go.

This is mind-boggling, and I’m never sure what to make of it but it means that time is not a constant it is relative to the observer. And yet, we see time as a constant, something that remorselessly ticks forward and which we cannot alter. But it isn’t.

For a better explanation, see https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Relativity_of_simultaneity